Lullabye for The Naturalist

The Naturalist and I were listening to my itunes selection, when a song came on that reminded me of when she was a baby. In fact, it was the song I used to rock her to most often. Notice I didn’t say, ‘rock her to sleep’ most often, because there wasn’t much sleep going on when she was a baby. Or a toddler. Or even a preschooler/schooler. Actually, there still isn’t tons of sleep with her…but now she’s able to draw/read/write/doodle/listen to her ipod quietly in bed, so it doesn’t affect me like it used to. It also helps that we don’t have a rigid schoolbus/starting schoolday¬† schedule to follow.

She cried when she was a newborn. She cried a lot. It wasn’t really colic. It was just…she didn’t really like being a baby, I guess. I don’t think she liked laying around looking at things, watching people move all around except her. The more mobility she achieved, the happier she became.

In any case, traditional lullabies didn’t work well for her. Too slow, too boring, too quiet. She slept best when being jostled at a fast clip, help tight to my chest so there was no ‘head bobble’. A song had just come out on the radio, by The Cardigans. Anyone remember ‘Lovefool’? It was the perfect beat, and perfect rhythm for baby wrangling.

I started singing it to her often, and eventually I changed the words around to suit my situation. It went a little something like this:

Dear, I fear we’re facing a problem
you love me sleep no longer, I know
and maybe there is nothing
that I can do to make you do
Mama tells me I shouldn’t bother
that I ought just stick to another man you’ll sleep when you wanna
a man that surely deserves me but you aren’t sleeping at all,
and I think you do should!

So I cry, I pray, and I beg…
Love me, love me Sleepy! Sleepy!
Say that you love me you’re sleepy.
Fool me, fool me
Go on and fool me!
Love me, love me Sleepy! Sleepy!
Pretend that you love me you’re sleepy.
Leave me, leave me Lay down, Lay down
Just say that you need me you’re sleepy!
I can’t care ’bout anything but you sleep!!!

Lately I have desperately pondered,
Spent my nights awake and I wonder
What I could have done in another way
To make you stay sleep!

Reason will not lead to solution,
And I end up lost in confusion.
I don’t care if you really care
As long as you don’t go go to sleep!

So I cry, I pray, and I beg…
Love me, love me Sleepy! Sleepy!
Say that you love me you’re sleepy.
Fool me, fool me
Go on and fool me!
Love me, love me Sleepy! Sleepy!
Pretend that you love me you’re sleepy.
Leave me, leave me Lay down, Lay down
Just say that you need me you’re sleepy!
I can’t care ’bout anything but you sleep!!!

That song got me through many a late night and nap-less day, I tell you. So much so, that now it’s part of her newbornhood in my memory. It’s not Mozart’s “Night Music” but I find it more comforting than that ‘rock a bye’ stuff with the baby crashing down at the end.