Vertigo

Hubby experienced some crazy vertigo last week, after getting a cold. He just couldn’t stand up or walk around for very long without falling over or feeling sick. I pulled the standard mom-ism and suggested bedrest and lots of water…a good start to combat any sickness, yes? It passed after a day or two, we figure it had something to do with a virus or something disturbing his inner ear.

This morning, after experiencing a minor cold this weekend, I awoke to disorienting vertigo whenever I moved my head. I tried to cook it off by making breakfast for everyone, but toasting Eggo waffles got the better of me and I retreated back to bed.

“It’s OK mom, we’ll take care of things down here!” Golfer shouted up encouragingly.

The last time I had vertigo, I was 50 feet underwater in a mudpit (excuse me, I mean natural spring) in Wendover, Nevada. Hubby and I were doing our final SCUBA certification dive in preparation for our honeymoon in the Bahamas, and after weeks of diving in the deep end of the local YMCA we were looking forward to getting it over with and going to a more exotic locale. The water in the natural spring was pretty clear until you put a bunch of newby SCUBA divers down at the bottom, flailing around and kicking up massive amounts of silt. All of a sudden the water turned dark, I couldn’t see anything in front of me, and I had the strangest feeling come over me. I couldn’t tell what was up or down, and I felt like I was doing cartwheels and pirouettes in the murky depths. Panic set in, I started flailing my arms around to feel for Soon-To-Be-Hubby. He gripped me in his arms but before he could pull me to the surface I succeeded in yanking his mask off his head so his eyes and nose were exposed to the water rushing in. For good measure, I also hooked into the regulator in his mouth…giving him oxygen he needed to, you know, live…and pulled it out of his mouth. In one fell swoop, I had totally disabled his ability to see and breathe.

If there’s a bigger buzz kill than almost killing your hubby before you’ve gotten to enjoy a fab. honeymoon, I don’t know what it is.

Luckily, hubby is a pretty unflappable dude. He calmly replaced his mask and blew out his regulator before putting it back in to breathe…just like they taught him in SCUBA school. I was too busy freaking out (like they taught me NOT to do) to notice the havoc. Hubby grabbed my hands and pulled me up to within 10 feet of the diving platform, where we floated in neutral boyancy until we’d given our bodies enough time to adjust. This gave me time to settle down, get my bearings, and look at him through the silt and our goggles. He was so strong, and brave, and he could really take charge of a situation…3 things I admired so much about him because I wasn’t any of those things!

We surfaced…he slowly removed his mask and said the words any bride-to-be lives for…

“What. The. HELL!!!”

A very restrained response, all things considered.

All’s well that ends well, though. We both certified and had a great time being dive partners on our honeymoon in Florida and the Bahamas.

Now that I’m older and wiser, I’m thinking that the cosmos was trying to give hubby and I an analogy about marriage–if it doesn’t kill you, it’s quite an exciting adventure!

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4 Responses

  1. OMG…that made me laugh out loud.

    “We surfaced…he slowly removed his mask and said the words any bride-to-be lives for…

    “What. The. HELL!!!”

    A very restrained response, all things considered.”

    Sounds like a match made in Heaven. 😛

  2. Aaaah, Bless them.
    One and All.

  3. Fabulous! That was a classic hubby moment so indicative of the future. 🙂 Scuba diving in the Bahamas sounds like bliss.

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