birds and bees, horses and chest areas.

So, before I can blog more meaningful things like our trip to NYC, I have to spill about an interesting development here chez Child’s Play.

Specifically, it has to do with Golfer who has managed to grow quite big this summer without me realizing it.

It’s like, I see him permanently as a 5 year old or something, so I get shocked when it’s time to buy size 10 pants and a shoe that is roughly the size of my own.

So, he’s taking a drama class. It’s a new thing for him, he’s testing the waters so to speak, and so up to this point we haven’t had much experience with the art of the Play or the people who like it. He’s been taking it for the last month, and last week when I asked him how it was going he got a strange look on his face.

“Well, it’s going good. We’re doing Jack and the Beanstalk, which is a little babyish, so I volunteered to play the part of the beanstalk since I don’t want to say any of the lines.”

“Sounds like a good plan, Golfer.”

“But mom, the girls in there….I mean, one girl in there….she’s really…..she……she has a crush on me or something.”

“You know, Golfer, I’ve been expecting this. You have your Dad’s good looks and my brilliant charm. Lots of girls will have crushes on you.”

“But mom, she touched me in my chest area…”

Wha?! What did he say?!

“Wha?? What did you say?!”

“Well, we were doing a drama exercise and playing charades. I was on her team and she said she had to tell me something that the other team couldn’t hear, so she grabbed me by my shirt…right in my chest area!!!…and pulled me over into a corner and whispered something IN MY EAR and the whole time she kept holding on to my CHEST AREA!!!!!!!”

It’s the first time I’ve seen him blush. I care less about this grabby girl feeling all over my son’s chest area as I do that Golfer is now noticing where girls are grabbing him.

Good heavens, I’m not ready for another hot sex talk with him.

When Hubby came home, Golfer had more of the story to tell us. Apparently, during the charade game, you could choose to be an animal. So this grabby girl chose to be a horse and then announced, “But only Golfer can ride me!”

Loud, unexpected coughing and masked giggling from Hubby and me.

Golfer continued, “She grabbed my chest area again and told me she wanted me to ride her.”


This is worse than the hot sex talk.

I hid my head behind hubby while trying to compose myself and wipe away the tears streaming down my face, I was laughing so hard.

Hubby pipes up. “Yeah, yeah. That’s the way some girls are, Golfer. And then sometimes, they tell you that not only are you the only one that can ride them, you can’t ride anyone else anymore.”

At this point, I start snorting in uncontrollable laughter.

“yep, Golfer, girls can be pushy like that.”

And it’s true. We really can be. And this girl…man, she’s got some skillz. Not ever being a drama girl, I’m wondering if this is the reason drama girls were all so popular in high school?

So, he goes back on Tuesday, and I really can’t wait to hear how it goes.


10 Responses

  1. OMG is right! I think I would have had to leave the room! Your husband handled it brilliantly, though. And I think you may be onto something about those drama girls!LOL!

  2. Hi Tiffany,
    My ds is only 9, and I am unable to relate to this; also, may be because I come from India, and we are still kind of hanging inbetween cultures, more so towards what we are more familiar with:)……But OMG would be my way of expressing too…
    I cannot help but think how naive I was even in high school years and college years! Those days no longer exist, I suppose, even in India. I actually found your dh’s way of handling it so causally to be pretty interesting. I think he did a brilliant job:) But how fun to see your boy grow up!

  3. OMG!!! ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!! And now a coughing fit is ensuing………Thanks Tiff!

  4. WOW- just wow

  5. wow, just wow

  6. OMG! I’m glad there aren’t any of “those girls” in my son’s drama class ; ) That is hilarious!!! You must update after class on Tuesday!!!

  7. I would have been on the floor. Crying. You held it together better than I would have. I would have laughed so hard I probably would have scarred the poor kid for life! LOL

  8. ROFLMAO!! Quite a forward girl there ๐Ÿ™‚

  9. I wish her mother had heard her!
    You know…. just for kicks. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  10. First of all, I am dying laughing!!! But the mom of 2 boys in me is also hugging my knees to my chest and rocking back and forth — soooo not ready for big boys :0 or the girls that chase them…AAAAHHH!

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